in wake of marching: listen, connect, organize

i gotta say folks (and i’m speaking to mostly white women here – i’m trying to collect my people), watching and feeling the tension before, during and in the wake of the women’s marches has been deeply painful. there are people getting defensive about critiques. there are people who are exhausted, trying to make critiques in a meaningful, respectful way. there are people who are using shame and lateral violence because they feel unheard.
i think that most of us want desperately for this march to mean something. for it to represent a meaningful shift towards a better world. some of us felt this. some of us did not. some felt included. some felt pensive. some felt excluded. many of us did or now do feel confused. some of us felt like we did an amazing thing and then felt hurt that others did not see it in the same way. some felt like it was bullshit from the beginning, which is usually related to a deep feeling of non belief that things can get better through mainstream or liberal change. or not believing things can get better period.

what i see over and over and over is people feeling a lack of connection. people struggling to listen to each other. people struggling to see critique, not as personal attack, but rather as an invitation to deep profound work. work on self and work in community. i see those invitations being offered from a place of pain, rather that from a place of trust. and i think it totally makes sense why this is the case.

the ways we connect with each other are fucking broken.

we need to listen more and see the humanity in each other. and we especially need to learn to do this towards the most marginalized and traumatized in our society and communities. i’m not saying we shouldn’t have boundaries. or that we should accept the impacts of lateral violence. these things do not help tend meaningful connection. what i am saying is, before you type a comment -breathe- allow yourself to feel. allow yourself to connect to the profound humanity of the moment – the humanity in you and the humanity of the other person/people you are interacting with.


allow yourself to feel powerful, because you are. we are. we are powerful beyond measure. and it is precisely that power that is being turned back on us.

we are struggling and trying not to drown, and in the process we are drowning each other, especially those who are the most oppressed. we are stepping on each others faces, forcing each other underwater as we try to reach sunlight and it doesn’t need to be like this.

the wound is open, once again. let. it. breathe.

Repeal Hyde Art Project
Repeal Hyde Art Project


multiple truths can exist simultaneously. its possible that these marches were profoundly meaningful AND exclusionary. what i know to be true is that a march is a momentary show of force and without long term organizing and relationship building the force of this mo(ve)ment will dwindle to nothing. so go out. listen. build relationships. read. share your story. and most importantly. learn to believe each other. this system feeds on systematic violence and deeply internalized feelings of isolation and difference. we can’t over come this difference by acting like it does not exist. we need to see it as our greatest strength.

because it is. and we should tend to it like we believe that to be true.

please share this post wherever you think it will be helpful. if you appreciate my work you can support me, book a tarot reading or an herbal consultation. you can also donate to #blacklivesmatter, or standing rock, or to somewhere, anywhere that lifts up the voices of oppressed and marginalized people. <3 <3